Gosh, it has been a really long time since I've posted anything new…. Almost 3 weeks! I’m so sorry about that. The day after I posted my last blog, Leah was sent home from school with a fever, and it turned out that she had another UTI. It was one of those things that I was just kicking myself because she had thrown up twice earlier that week, which is usually a sign that something is not right. We brushed it off, but I should have known. We started her on an antibiotic Thursday night but she was still feverish throughout the weekend, and really clingy and we could tell she was not feeling well. There was a point when we were debating whether or not to take her into the doctor because we were really worried, thinking it was maybe a shunt failure. Dr. Marker assured us that it’s probably a UTI and to come in if her fever hit 104…. Thankfully it never did and she was starting to feel better after a few days of antibiotics. It made for a few long nights for us, as she wasn't sleeping well, and there was lots of worrying on our part. I’m happy to report that she’s made a full recovery and is now doing great.
Her being sick put us back into an old habit with regards to sleep. I’m a bit embarrassed to admit this but we haven’t had a really good routine when it comes to getting her to bed. We were very good about sleep habits until last winter when she had shunt surgery, followed by a cold and then the flu and then teething, and all of the sudden it was summertime and now it’s fall, and I’m still rocking her to sleep every night. When she wakes up in the middle of the night, I bring her into bed with me. The night waking didn't bother me, until it started happening almost every other night, and happening earlier and earlier in the evening, at which point I was going to bed at 8:30/9:00 with her. It finally came to a breaking point with me last week when I decided to put her down awake have her fall asleep on her own, and after several nights of her taking over an hour to fall asleep, I was done. If you've ever read the book “Go the F to Sleep” you know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t read it, please find a copy. It’s hilarious and depressing at the same time. There is something to be said about sleep deprivation.
Anyway, I’m not asking for sleep advice, I don’t want sleep advice, this is something that we need to figure out in our house what’s going to work. I was laying awake the other night thinking about it, stressing, feeling overwhelmed and frustrated and ready to scream or cry or leave on a long vacation when I realized something. I’m freaking out about sleep. Not her shunt. Not tethered cord surgery. Not how I’m going to pay for piles of medical bills. Not about sending her into her 10th surgery. Not about how I have to think about quitting my job because she has too many appointments. Not because we can’t find good childcare for her so I can continue working. NONE OF THAT. Because my little girl is FINE!! I’m thinking about something that is fairly trivial, at least in the grand scheme of things when it comes to having a daughter with special needs. And that, my friends, is when I finally got some sleep.
